~Inspiration~

My inspiration my muse

You are the rain tapping

On the tin roof 

As thunder rolls above

The sheer silence

The sun glistening upon leaves

Peaking through clouds

The way he looked at me

The way he touches

The way the child smiled at me

The book I have read

Thoughts left unsaid
Books still on a shelf

The passion once felt

The love I have

The pain I endured

The doves cooing

The birds chirping

The wind that blew by

The beautiful blue sky

The lyrics to a song

Life how it sometimes goes wrong

The crush I may have

Conversations that have ended

Trees and their amazing strength 

The touch of a friend who taps your shoulder

The fact that we are all getting older

The smell of rain

The touch of my pets fur

The painting at the museum 

The words beautiful explanations

Brought to life

The questions

The oceans

The rivers & Lakes

All Gods creatures

Including the snake

Inspiration is all around

Even your feet on the ground 

Sand between my toes

The skip in my jump

Fire & ice

How to entice

Elements and beauty all around

That’s where my inspiration is found~

~Eulogy-My Epitaph~

My Eulogy, My epitaph 

Can’t be written

Can’t contain

All the bullshit that Will remain

You know not about silence you have no clue~

You think art a weapon

Used by you?

Ha!

That is funny!

Think your self special my darling My honey~

I can spit out words faster than you think~

Faster than the bottle from ,Which you drink~

Don’t announce yourself to me

Tell me your ~I’m back”~

You’re the fire the lightening, Really is that a fact?

Or more bullshit you concote, Damn what a shock~

Not really your predictable you see?

If I want to see then I will, Otherwise should’ve let it be

Hacking my blog!

Think it’s cool?

All that college all that school, And to think I think you nothing more than a fool~

So you crack a code, Mix a spell,All that shit go to hell~

The jewel you found, Fascinated were you~

But you did see, That I can view, Things unseen, Feel you too~

I have a gift given at birth, Some say a blessing ,I often think it a curse~

So trend your words ,Algorithm and stride ,Get ready my Darling,For your big ride~

I could write and write, Forever you see especially,When it’s about you And me~

I’m lyrically gifted as well its seems, I take one simple word make it a dream……

Or a nightmare to frighten to scare To remind all who know me, Best beware~

There is not another you Know like me, but I know others exist….

I live in the know, Just as the tides ebb and flow~

Some say I’m a Cather of Catherism, no protest! But they do nonetheless~

My Tribe are the shaman, oracles of old.. Catherism….lights shine through the glass of a church like a prism~

Make others wonder how this is so, Art is no weapon!

Ha!

It’s a beautiful dance, It is what I am, What I will always be~

My epitaph~

My Eulogy~

I’m living,You see~

I forgot you know not, Blinded by ego~

A hurt that is fake, You go crawl the earth now, You scorpion snake~

#######

~Preemptive~

Preemptive I suppose

I leave first

You silver tongue devil

You had me almost

But all of my life I stood by

With hope learning to cope

No more

Preemptive I am

Strike you down  

Out of my sight 

Purged from my mind

You can come to look

You will not find

Preemptive in love

Just as in war

I am a missile

I reach out so far

I’ll tear down your defenses

I close in on you all around

Slash your heart first

Never again it’s now

A curse

Laid upon me long ago

A trust can be broken only so many times

Am I confused unable to see

I breed in you and you breed in me

And we also bleed too!

Your deceit

Is a pool of my blood around your feet

My blood, my scars 

No one can never cross far over my lines

Drawn in a particular way

So when I am done

I have the say

Preemptive 

I can’t even make it a month 

Thinking of what could be us

I see to much fault

You are not what I thought

Characteristics you portray

Soon fade away 

So I jump out

Leaving you quickly

I can’t conceive 

Why you can’t perceive 

That I am no longer shackled

By love or sex 

Well I’d like to think

Mortal coil craves

I’m human

I have my days

I’m preemptive 

You wonder how you let go the best

It’s not you

It’s not a test

So go on your way 

Give it a rest

Wait what did I just say 

I changed my mind

 My Love ❤️ Stay~

~Dark Bipolar Suicide Thoughts~NJM~

Suicide is what happens when the pain and hell you feel each day on earth overshadows the fear of a Hell in the after life or a meager existence if reincarnated.

And so the ocean welcomed her with open arms and swept her away from the hell on earth she lived. She whispered a Prayer that her father accepts his child as any father would whose child endured to much pain.

~Suicide Tendency~ A Must Read~

The grand entrance will yield
Exquisite exit revealed
Choose which door
Dropped to the floor 
And to think that it’s all seems a Complete bore….. This life so fake
It makes one wonder if life is to take? At a time of our choosing 
And is it really this life that I’m loosing?
These Social niceties….
..These lies…
…This show is exhausting 
Wearing these mask
It’s a grueling nightmarish daily task
Surreal Essenes clouds
eyes are heavy, as is the mind
And much of this seems to be a waste of my time
I’m gonna choose this door wisely
With swift conviction I will prepare don’t temp fate not on a dare…
my exit…
Or my entrance 
Exquisite , Grandeur 
Just be cautious
Tell no one that’s for damn sure
Silence…….
..Leaping into the unknown area
Exiting exquisitely
There, where all suicide tendency subsides
In this great unknown emptiness that deeply divides~

Not For Reproduction

  

~Fat Tuesday~

Fat Tuesday is here 

my Darlin Dear

Preemptive plight 

Planned party

Late night

Mardi Gras is here

It’s that time of year

skies hued 

yellow, purple, green aglow

The sounds clamoring 

Fighting to outdo 

each musical note

There we were dancing 

Swaying to the beat of the

Floats the heat

Jazz music fills the streets

Down Canal street turning round to 
cross over to Bourbon~

Take in each shot

Preemptively planned

Glass in hand

Other hand in yours

Flying high 

beads round our neck making music 

of their own

Debris in the streets

Faces smeared

Drunken flow

Dancing in flight

Cheap trinkets flying

Dashing, fighting, grinding

Preemptively planned party

Your eyes two lights flaming bright 

watching your sexy arm

Light your Marlboro

Smiles and giggles 

Two jokes only we are in on

Blowing your smoke out

Between your sexy lips

I get close and kiss your lips

Playfully biting the lower one

Endless fun

Pass that joint don’t bogard 

It’s high time for all

It’s this night we aim to please 

Preemptively planned plight

Gonna party all damn night

Then some more

On each street corner

Stands a whore

Sodom and Gomorrah

What a life Darlin what sight

Pulling you closer  

Let this night never be over never be done~

The entire world is watching

All the court jesters

All the clowns

All the kings and queens on floats wearing their crown~

Hey that’s a decent poison 

Crown Royal over rocks

Splash of water barkeep please

Don’t be stingy now pour long don’t tease~

Walking don’t dare run 

And then it fades

Leaving, lingering 

Till next year we preemptively plan again for this night~

Fat Tuesday Darlin Dear

I hear you whisper in my ear

As we float high above the rest

Preemptive plight party all night

Fat Tuesday

Madri Gras 

We will do it again and again

Mardi Gras never ends~

Not for reproduction

~NJM

~Poe Park~

Just as you are

How can you not see

just as you are

Is no better than me

You stood by the subway

Looking back

Your hair a mess

Where is the color

In your face 

Where are you going

Why are you leaving this place?

Jeans are to big 

You lost to much weight 

I want you to know

Just as you are

I still love you

Drugs and all

Am I the opiate you had to leave

Was I your heart you wore on your sleeve?

Was it the cocaine fueled night

Downtown all that flair

Dancing and swinging

To the beat

Full of fire 

Full of heat 

If I’m your drug 

Don’t detox me

I love you just as you are

See?

Our eyes glassed over we love the drugs hip hop baby like well dressed Thugs~

Feeling the textures

Giving the hugs

Drinking the water

Sweat pouring down

You were my king baby

You wore the crown

So you grab your glass of Macallan Whiskey you keep in your bar~
Take a deep sip

Then with a tip

You swallow the rest

Damn dear Darlin 

This is not a test

Whiskey fueled nightmare

So where is your blue label scotch 

Sure that will be next

Line of cocaine 

And forget all the rest…….Of them

I sit on the benches 

In Poe park

Children running 

Dirty feet

Smudged faces

Where are you going

To what places

I love you just as you are

Like my Austin Sculpture art

Whimsical fantasy 

Limitless treasure

How I remember

The museums

Our secrete pleasure~

I feel you used me like many before

You used them then like waddled paper on the floor~

You showed them out of your door 

You were done

You took what they gave you

You had your fun

So here I sit in Poe park


Was I like them

Did you discard me

Like chewing gum

You had to taste 

Then spit me out

Into the street

Where I got stuck beneath your feet?

I still love you

Just as you are

I’ll be in the park

I’ll bare the scar

My heart feels 

Empty as you headed

Down the subway

You look away

I want you dear Darlin

Please stay

Sit with me on the bench

In Poe Park

We can be that sculpture

Living art

I still love you

Just as you are

Look for me when your back

I’m your brightest star

I’ll still be me

Only not free

And I’ll still love you just as you are

Not for reproduction~

~NJM~