~Him~How, Where & When?~

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 Waking up thoughts all scattered. Once fully awake and gathered, she immediately feels the restless energy he emits… who else can feel him? I am the only one he keeps hidden yet I live in his mind, beat in his heart, swim in his blood.Know what? he does the same to me.
Life is not merely a series of meaningless acts or consequences. No oh no,you see…Life is but a tapestry of events that culminate into an exquisite sublime plan. May it slowly unfold into what is you and I. May we turn and spiral in the cosmic dance the one that brought us together by a planned chance~

Consistency …..And Sparta? Yes!!

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I decided long ago consistency does count, but I forgot it is a two way street. I can’t be the only one striving for that attribute in any relationship. 
If you’re not able to also be acknowledgeable of me in consistent status, then I Guess you can’t run in my 300. Not many can it should be called my 3 lol. Since I barely trust anyone and I have two I can count on…. they run in my 3 …….. huh my 3…And play it out like 300.

Sparta! They consistently worked together to eventually defete an empire. It was dedication to the consistency that was beautiful. They moved as one unit.If you can’t communicate with me and act as a team as a unit then please do us all a favor stay away already.

I live in my Sparta and I’m gonna Conquer my distractions in many ways… May God be with me~ and may he be with you too~ God Speed~ we all need it~

~Going Live today from 12-1 East Coast time~If you Missed it~ Archives! Updates I put wrong Link to find Archives~

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Less than 1 hour I will be on ~Moments of Clarity~ with Tiffany Werhner. Tune in via web from anywhere http://www.tantalk1340.com/

Engage call in with comments, questions! I’ll be promoting my work and up coming books.

So follows please listen and call I would love to get feedback from my follows.

Call 866-826-1340

12-1 today east coast time

If you missed it you can listen to archives of all Tiffanys show ~Moments of Clarity~  at

http://www.internetradiopros.com/momentsofclarity/
Scroll down and you will see the show and the guest names.

See you there my loyal follows call in!!

~Take Me Now~I’m Yours~

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As dusk approaches

Our lips touch briefly 

Jumping up I run

Waiting for you to chase me

Through this field of green

Sun glistening off distant oak trees leaves

The fall breeze

Flows around 

Find me

Tackle me

To the ground 

Kiss me again

Harder more forceful 

Bring me closer

As your hands flow

Over my curves

Taste me

I give in

Passions explodes

Fireworks and confetti 

Seem to……..

Paint the atmosphere

You took me down

And in your arms and heart may I

Always be found ~

NJM~

~The Past~

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I pull away. You’ve hurt me. There is nothing that will ever heal it completely.

My soul is dim, all due to him… You.

But all in all I love you too.

Love doesn’t live in digits it surpasses age, transcends boundaries . Number are numbers. Pick one.

That simple~Always.~

Ttys.

~DAR~Updated

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Hello how you feeling today We ended the month of May

While you were yet away

Doctors seem stupid in light of it all, I’ve watched for so long now saw how you fall

Hello my dear enemy my oldest friend half our lives are now gone this could be your end

I’m not going to sugar coat nor

Make it taste sweet, see we both shocked each other before

Knocked us off our feet.

I will always be here for you while I am here. There can’t be a promise no matter what you think you hear.

I realize now we both live our biggest fear.

I’m glad we found peace after all that fucked up shit.

I know you want to take back all the things you did, I want to forgive you but I did, I just don’t forget.

Knowing this is always going to be regret…. for us both.

We grew up together then grew far apart.

I hope they can heal you and your heart, yes it’s broken in many ways. 

But if they release you from the hospital now then count your days.

So we have your diagnosis congestive heart failure. You’re biggest challenge now is will God be in your favors, or will you dies in your 40’s like I once said,

If this is the case you are gonna be dead.

I am what I’ve become

And I have not a clue what I’ll be

But I have a clearer vision now and I see what I see.

Everyone deserves love in some type of way.

I pray to God you find that love before your dying day.

That’s what I pray

It’s all I have to say

Be well~

He needs you more.

Rejected like me don’t let him be. So live damn it, live change what you need. Think of your son now, let go of the greed.

I hope you read this and it plants the seed.

~NJM~

~Fragility of Life~

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A heart beating

Soul craving
A longing not yet known
A urge in all humans to not be alone~
It’s the rain on the roof in a strong summer storm
The walls we build up
To stay self preserved but not for long~
Life and the essence
Perpetual glow
Inner peace deep inside
Often we know~
The blindness unrecognized looking away
Rather not hurt
See what we want
Hear as we chose
Never wanting lose ~
Eventually it crumbles some unfortunate event
Tired not alert, completely spent~
Death, sweet death visits us all
Why are we shocked dismayed, fall? It happens to all, to all~
As surely you were born, open your eyes to see what is you will no longer be eventually~
Death does come closer so close everyday, so it’s living each moment to the fullest we pray~
“Fear” that element griping most all
We will all turn to dust we will crumble we will fall~
You can’t plan for sure what day that will be, but accepting this truth helps us….and you see, to be….. At peace in a subtle way just living forgetting about that dying day~
Fragility, beauty the delicate star shooting so high will fall oh so far
Burning out
Leaving a mark or so some hope……
Super nova’s are we bright surreal
But there comes a day you no longer will truly feel~
Pieces of ashes crumbles of rock flying around falling like the stars straight to the ground … Off into space, some place still unknown yet to us~
From ashes to ashes from dust to dust~

~Stillness~

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Stillness …..

Be mine for the day

Perhaps the week

If you could find it in yourself to keep

Me~

Bid me silence.. Deep sleep

Stillness ……

Find me 

Hold me close 

Let me not stray to far

If you would bid me peace

Peace of mind

Stillness tell me why… You’re very Elusive and even more so hard to find

And I will search for you daily

I will pray that you are mine

I will seek this stillness Until the end of this line

This time …..

Uniquely sublime

Still~

~Love & Hope Left the Building~For Real~

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There is a pain so deep the words escape my lips I have not uttered these words because they don’t exist.
My world has been torn and shredded for far to long and my head is full of hellish memories that won’t leave my mind alone.
Peace might come visit me but on a random schedule. No matter what day you see me out in public you would never know, because I wear my mask well. Smiling. Underneath crying.
For the very first time in my life all of the love, care, and selflessness all the good human qualities seem to be seeping out of me.
I cry out to God to take me, but I get no answer. So God where are you? If you read this and believe in God pray for me my life.
I’m not Robin Williams, not Whitney Houston, Prince or the latest tragedy. I’m like a storm out there in the nothingness brewing and has been for years.. If TIRED has ever been the only word to describe this or the condition of “can’t take no more.” Then how sad our human language is to not tap beyond boundaries to explore the truest meaning of that word. All I do is utter sounds as I cry out.
Oh death I care not of your sting! Sting the shit out of me, oh darkness go …….go gently in the night and take me with you, or give me courage to do as I’ve spoken of and thought of countless times.
I had many dreams and outcomes I once hoped for but after the scrutiny of this thing I call my life

All those dreams are dead as is my hope.
Call me a coward, pathetic or anything you wish. I don’t care I only wanted love just someone who loves me for me and wouldn’t hurt me but hold me. That does not exist. At least not in my world, not  as I need.

~Fragments of Life~ In Short Thoughts~NJM~

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“Thoughts of situations that have happened or may never happen. Some are in poetic brief statements. Others short stories, scenarios, entertained thoughts of mine I hope you relate to in some abstract form. This is a different style of writing I am attempting, I hope to engage all. I believe these fragments are yet to be, or already live between you and me

 

He drew in the smoke…watching the smoke that was not contained in his lungs wave and twirl. Slowly the pain went away.

Riveting! the chill spread up her spine, hair stood up on the back of her neck, and goose bumps covered her body.

Pressure from your hand crashed down through the glass obliterating it into a mini explosion of ice shards that sliced right through skin… I felt your need of me of each breath, each time you pressed again and again. Then circuits burned and all boards went down without messages needed to convey system failed. Even our binary was off beat. Not one code understood. Alone without value. Yet we stayed.

Spilt time puddled upon the floor of existence like a glass of milk pooled on the kitchen table waiting… To be cleaned up.

“He was so sick of having to check his blood glucose, so sick of needles, the infusions sets, and the carb counting, he was sick of being so different.”

There is a vessel of emptiness waiting to be filled by a presence so extraordinary that to contain it is not possible, yet to walk with it most probable furthermore destined.

Up head the distance revealed an alluring shadow likened to a darkness of smoke rather than of a shadow when examined closer. I indulged the illusion by complete acknowledgement only to be aware it wasn’t an illusion but you. Forces of nature gathered the four corners blowing the winds that crashed gracefully upon the shores as the sun burned brightly reflecting diamonds glistening in the sand retracting in your eyes.

Hands of precision tickling the tips of your split apart fingers reaching …Eyes that meet with twinkles and the awkward yet unfolding uniqueness of possible new love. Butterflies blossoming in my abdomen feeling like taking flight could be possible, as the moment etched further into their minds burning singeing in their hearts memories that live forever and he kissed her. Her first kiss.

She gurgled a scream that could be heard for a mile. The madness of her reality split. Vengeance seeped into her veins. She will never be the same.

Fragments of each other all scattered over our flesh our mind. Nanoparticles mixed by the human touches and shared thoughts, that’s what we are fragments, and I love each fragments each frame and all especially the stills. Captivating.

The psychiatric said to him, You have bipolar disorder. He looked baffled, no mental illness ran in his family. In a daze he stared back at the doctor… Thinking I won’t live like this. What will everyone say, the stigma, it’s already too much I can barely function.

“Couldn’t have been that profound if it didn’t stick.”

I often dream of far away places and far away faces obscure and unfriendly, and I can’t seem to wake up.

Swear we were packed like a can of sardines in that car, but it didn’t matter we were happy just to be there

I watched as the sky blossemed into a live picture show above the horizon slowly revealing itself inch by inch rising as it painted the canvas of the sky, the illumination grew stronger it was a sunrise to remember.

They yelled “sinner! Murderess! You’re killing your unborn child. Specters claiming to be Christians judging her as she walked closer to the clinic doors. The door seemed a mile away, she couldn’t help but shrink away inside and pray….God help me.They judged her. But yet call themselves Christians. If that’s Christianity I want no part of it.They judged her. But yet call themselves Christians. If that’s Christianity I want no part of it. Then climbed upon the examination table.

I got in!!! I got in!!! As he ran into his clique of friends. Waving his acceptance letter to the university that would pave his way to his unknown future.

Her legs dangled from the edge of the bed. Feeling all hope gone. Wondering if heaven and hell exist will God let her in… She swallowed the pills three by three and uttered  “Father, Son, Holy Spirit” looking down the bottle empty, as empty as she felt. The loss was too much. slowly consciousness slipped away.

I threw your little body up up into the air as you softly landed into my arms and I pulled you close. Your smell, your small hands your eyes big in wonderment looking at me… I was enveloped by your love my angel from God.

I narrowed in and lowered my knees just enough to give me the angle and sprint needed for an effortless beautiful dive.I swam to the edge of the pool looked up and it was you, we both smiled.

He was the object of her desire. He loved knowing this. Tormented her at times. Like Dangling carrots. Winds of change blew in and her heart finally desired someone who desired her back. He was left in the wake of her tides as she drifted away at sea farther from him and closer to the one to be her true lover. Regret festered in his desire at that moment.

At the speed of snail I passed your house. The wind blew harshly by. I stared hoping to catch a glimpse of you. I would have settled for the family dogs appearance. But you’re gone… And I wait like a fool believing you will return.

 

“Does our absolute rise beyond infinity or does it die when we do?”

 

“Sometimes I’m so tired of all of it I just feel like settling.”

 

Laying down eyes closed listening to the crackles of leaves beneath your feet and the trickle of the distant stream near by, my mind wanders, I can only imagine what we would do behind closed doors.

 

You’ll drive I’ll shoot. We’ll be a modern day Bonnie and Clyde. Naw Micky and Malory instead, what’s your thoughts?

The car door slightly open as one foot dangles in and the other out. Turning the key  in the ignition I stop and grin thinking about you and I’m positive you’re grinning too thinking bout me, aren’t we just the two?Me and you.

 

She eagerly waited like a kid waiting to open a gift for his call. Listlessly she hung her body on the end of the bed, half on half hanging off. A despair that was crawling in her. Then it rang. Her heart jumped and she sprung for the phone,  “Hey how you doing “His voice came across the line….. what he doesn’t know is she wasn’t doing nothing but hurting thinking he may not call. If he knew how she intense she felt he would call early on purpose….. But stubborn she’ll keep grim self deprecating sides to herself.

 

Mosaic of memories and pieces of a life kept in frames upon the shelf  but not kept in order randomly arranged.

 

Can I be a part of your Life time? and all the ones in between……..

Finally She ran into him. After years there he was on the same grocery isle as me only feet away. Years she thought in the same town, same small town. There eyes met but she quickly looked away. It was too much as tears puddled in corners of her eyes she felt a hand on her shoulder, he finally found the courage to tell her, speak to her… Was it too late? The pain to much? Her heart said “not this time. Your moment of extraordinary has arrived.” Let him in.” So she looked at him then to the ground as tears flowed. He lifted her chin to look at him. That was all it took. Forever began.

Not for Reproduction~NJM~