Perimeters~

Perimeters~
Loneliness
A feeling so singular
A despair that numbs
No one around you
No where for them to come
Much less would you run if they did
Who can you trust
In this life you have to have one
At least they say it’s a must
Don’t believe them
There is……
A home that is lost
Friends walk away
Seems in this life
Nothing will stay
Alone
In silence
Able to just think
To sink
Downward
Into the pits of ominous clouds
Thoughts of a past screams out loud
People who loved you
Lied
None kept
All I can feel
Is completely inept
A fear that grips
A suffering so real
That all you have left
Is no way to feel
But alone~
Emotional harm, Physical waste
Uneasy feeling bitter taste
Fastidious fear cry your last tear
Instigate Trifling
Presence so stifling
Negligent actions
Daunting infractions
Militant persuasion
Every occasion
Breeding your strife
Sucking up the last bit of my life
Mangled, tangled, fingers strangled
Inadequate hope
You hang from a rope
Your pain
It remains
Its all the same
It hurts this scar
Covering the body
Clenching grip
Obscene utterance on tongues tip
All will come to know
Pain…….
Is it Friend or Foe?
Relief or Thief
Or just belief~
Did he know?
Turning her away
Aware
Catching each gaze
Allowing to stare
Did he care?
Holding her heart
Tore it apart
Did he cry?
Knowing his lie
Would crush her
Can he live?
Give back to her
Parts he broke
Or will he choke?
As he cries gasping for air
Knowing just how little he cared
Will he recognize?
His selfish condition
Serving him first
Greed, thirst
Will he lie?
To himself
Others
Compensating for his
Malice
Will he come clean?
Tell the truth openly
Hoping his loss and his story
Will teach reach others like him
Or Will he fester in disdain?
Always thinking he is above
He is right
Never learning heartless cold
Slowly as he takes his lies to his death as he grows old.
Or can he find courage?
Knock on her door
Eyes down looking at the floor
Asking forgiveness for the trouble he caused, the pain he unleashed
Finding each word as they spill forth from his mouth…. Freeing his soul
Bringing healing to her finally made whole
Did he know?
Not for Reproduction~
And did you
There is a sadness that runs so deep
Out my pours it begins to seep
Little pools of vomit from the little holes
It started today
Again you turned my love away
What do I do with this love
I know it is true
But where do I keep it
I have not a clue.
I stayed up late my usual routine
Arose at 11
I never rolled a lucky 7
Snake eyes is my true roll
I seem to gamble with my soul
What do I do with this love
Tuck it away
The edges slip out
Jagged torn
I pray dear God why was I born?
Maybe I’m feeling you like I often do
Maybe you’re Sad and without a clue.
What do I do with the love meant only for you
When you turn me away
Telling me to let you go
You say ~Darlin you need to let me go, I’m not good for you~
How the fuck can you know, you think you are gifted with insight from some realm
Some unseen sight
You can’t truly be sure
Our love just might….
Survive in the place i prepared just for us
But my sadness pours out of my pours like puss
Please stop all this shit
The guise the game
For once in your life make a true change
I’m trying to work on my book
And my article post
Instead I hear my heart let it go
What do I do with the pain of rejection all my life
I never said take me as your wife
Just be there in the place I made just for two
That place I prepared for me and for you.
Do you love me too?
I’m impetuous and cruel
Act play a fool
When you turn me away
I didn’t ask for much
Just that you stay.
Is it because you can’t forgive yourself from the past
How you hurt me so
I lashed out then ran fast
Why is it I love the one who hurt me most
Who haunts me daily like a ghost?
What do I do with this love?
Tell me please
My mind is rambles already diseased….
What do I do with this love
My love
What this love?
~Hatreds Whore~
The subtle trapping of the flesh
Does eat the soul alive…
The folly of words that spin the web
Leaving strife and lies.
The subtle desensitizing of the mind
Eating way at the cells misfiring
Does the spirit still dwell even against its contrary morals?
Against the angst and frailty of justice?
And doth contempt churn within,
As disconcerting as before the subtle lies of hatreds whore?
~Hatreds Whore Part~2~
You crazy fool you think you have yet again advanced your position in this life?
Coddled entitlement chokes you and leads you ignorantly through the trenches you walk daily… Believing your own demented truths!
And does your existence prove to be so profitable?
Does your opinion truly count?
Or does thy soul eat away
The core of your spirit that
Dances idly alone through clouded dreams pass the Laws of men smothered by society’s brew eats the meat and flesh of your bones, your life and lies doth slowly chew, and spew…… You out… Spit forth
Leftovers are all you are fool, and to think you never knew !
And does thy soul magnify and convey the torment ?
Or do you smile, all the while eating lies up like a child?
~Epilogue to Hatreds Whore~
The Will of youth is fading
Hinged between realm’s of grey, black, white…..wrong, right smeared dripping, bleeding into each other~
Not yet divided by age ……definitely, to young to be old, to old to be young.
Seemingly timeless, don’t we wish to believe~
Thy will was strong, Ah Thy youth vigorous! Consuming, Passionate……..Yet time upon earth has broken the will of your youth, tainted, choked the spirit of your present condition once shared Devine connection….. Suffocating in a conformist fashion…Pre-made a template duplicated…. Scorned…even Hated~
Strange strengths unknown alive yet Lacking discipline~Ominous thoughts scatter about
Eating around the skirted Subjects best left secret, leaving no clue~
Unmastered skill yielding strength
imparting ability to carry forth much more intense tasks yet to be finished with flawless execution, instead drained by surrounding energies pertaining to tasks, trying times, ever smudging smearing lines~
Visions inspired by God… That great cosmic master have wiped the slate of prophecy clean~
Over exposure to environment wiped the mind void …..trying to distinguish which voice……… which vision was God, or Demons now lurking in corners, and shadows awaiting moments of weakness to torment thoughts, your soul.
Mute Divinity the Holy Spirit once directing every step, every action of times long lost…… Lost long before this present condition, this meager existence.
Doth this evil that exist supersede the once enveloping presence man thought God to be?
Those philosophical longings… Greater questions lingering, longing for answers……
Has exposure edified the presence of human thought upon God, as deceitful, longing to have control?
Does thought of a Godless world Condemn us swiftly without Regarded thought?
Without belief in tact?
Skeptics … Dare we be?
Ah we must! Indeed.
It’s down to science to fact…..Facts often proven failures later due to fallacy, policy, ignorance believing that the mysteries of the unseen, angels, demons the Supreme One are false?
Indeed subjective.
Your Experience prevails or does it Lack?
Has doubt allowed hate to negate….contradicting lies, sealing history’s fate? Squeezing the life out, draining needs of things considered holy, Devine, to seemingly cease?
Or does it thrive within you alive?
Hatred you whore, you demonic thief… Reeking havoc destruction and grief, yet easily graceful, alluring, enticing to beseech, even more so to easily reach~
Insidious belief difference divides
opposes thought……,action with deceit, malice, subtle thief….. whore, that hate, Trying to cloud human fate….
Venomous rage, collected, captured shackled in a cage
Scorned trifling rage
Hate… You whore
Ever present searching for more~
Hating today as much as yesterday maybe a little more….
Thus my name is Hatreds Whore~
Not For Reproduction~
Chattering heard whispers distance
Laden thoughts loudly waken
Inner peace completely shaken
grandeur spectacle,grace abound
Wings spread outward a glorious sound
Heaven bound! heaven bound !
But darkness creeps,the hell found
Majestically tathered whilst in flight
Eyes fixed dilated penetrating sight
Your face appears
A subtle grin
scales of justice
Weighs right in
Extending hands seal this fate
Reaching out past hades gate
Mere mortals shutter with defeat
While broken limb doth demons eat
Wishful fate Grasping hold I reach
But you slipped away
Your spirit yielded
I could not look
Your heart was empty
The hour glass shook
Cracked upon the floor
Sand spilling out
My fervent screams
into a mystical shout
Am I your angel?
Am I your demon?
Exalted I flex my wings
Fascinating melody will I sing
Searching for you
Bring you back
Hold you close
As thunder claps
Breath new life, I’ll quicken you
Perplex your mind
While I search onward
For my own kind
NJM~
Not for Reproduction~
I am the ice queen born on the 1st Perhaps that’s what makes me mean, makes me one of the worst. I didn’t realize I wore the crown
I didn’t look in the mirror didn’t see my frown, all I could see is my eyes dimly lit near death. I hated so that the ice queen was me, I hurt so much didn’t like whatj I see.
I used to have a warm caring heart but the stench, pain, decay, and state of this world tore and ripped it apart.
It used people, places, things and severed my mind.
Making what’s truthful and real so hard to find.
This ice isn’t melting, in fact it gets bigger every day.
I’m starting to think this ice queen won’t ever melt away.