~You are but a drop of rain in the endless ocean of life, don’t sell yourself short, make some waves~NJM~
To conceive that the person next to you is also a human being and to treat in the same respect. In that respect alone the total consciousness of humanity would shift and vibrate into a positive frequency.
I believe Jesus said “love thy neighbor as thyself”.
I walk down the street
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk I fall in. I am lost…… Helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk, I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place. But it isn’t my fault.It still takes a long time to get out.
I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it there. I still fall in…….. It’s a habit. My eyes are open, I know where I am. It is my fault I get out immediately.
I walk down the same street, there is a deep hole in the sidewalk, this time I walk around it.
I walk down another street.
The below song sums me up, and it’s to whoever knows all of me~
There is a pain so deep the words escape my lips I have not uttered these words because they don’t exist.
My world has been torn and shredded for far to long and my head is full of hellish memories that won’t leave my mind alone.
Peace might come visit me but on a random schedule. No matter what day you see me out in public you would never know, because I wear my mask well. Smiling. Underneath crying.
For the very first time in my life all of the love, care, and selflessness all the good human qualities seem to be seeping out of me.
I cry out to God to take me, but I get no answer. So God where are you? If you read this and believe in God pray for me my life.
I’m not Robin Williams, not Whitney Houston, Prince or the latest tragedy. I’m like a storm out there in the nothingness brewing and has been for years.. If TIRED has ever been the only word to describe this or the condition of “can’t take no more.” Then how sad our human language is to not tap beyond boundaries to explore the truest meaning of that word. All I do is utter sounds as I cry out.
Oh death I care not of your sting! Sting the shit out of me, oh darkness go …….go gently in the night and take me with you, or give me courage to do as I’ve spoken of and thought of countless times.
I had many dreams and outcomes I once hoped for but after the scrutiny of this thing I call my life
All those dreams are dead as is my hope.
Call me a coward, pathetic or anything you wish. I don’t care I only wanted love just someone who loves me for me and wouldn’t hurt me but hold me. That does not exist. At least not in my world, not as I need.
“Thoughts of situations that have happened or may never happen. Some are in poetic brief statements. Others short stories, scenarios, entertained thoughts of mine I hope you relate to in some abstract form. This is a different style of writing I am attempting, I hope to engage all. I believe these fragments are yet to be, or already live between you and me
He drew in the smoke…watching the smoke that was not contained in his lungs wave and twirl. Slowly the pain went away.
Riveting! the chill spread up her spine, hair stood up on the back of her neck, and goose bumps covered her body.
Pressure from your hand crashed down through the glass obliterating it into a mini explosion of ice shards that sliced right through skin… I felt your need of me of each breath, each time you pressed again and again. Then circuits burned and all boards went down without messages needed to convey system failed. Even our binary was off beat. Not one code understood. Alone without value. Yet we stayed.
Spilt time puddled upon the floor of existence like a glass of milk pooled on the kitchen table waiting… To be cleaned up.
“He was so sick of having to check his blood glucose, so sick of needles, the infusions sets, and the carb counting, he was sick of being so different.”
There is a vessel of emptiness waiting to be filled by a presence so extraordinary that to contain it is not possible, yet to walk with it most probable furthermore destined.
Up head the distance revealed an alluring shadow likened to a darkness of smoke rather than of a shadow when examined closer. I indulged the illusion by complete acknowledgement only to be aware it wasn’t an illusion but you. Forces of nature gathered the four corners blowing the winds that crashed gracefully upon the shores as the sun burned brightly reflecting diamonds glistening in the sand retracting in your eyes.
Hands of precision tickling the tips of your split apart fingers reaching …Eyes that meet with twinkles and the awkward yet unfolding uniqueness of possible new love. Butterflies blossoming in my abdomen feeling like taking flight could be possible, as the moment etched further into their minds burning singeing in their hearts memories that live forever and he kissed her. Her first kiss.
She gurgled a scream that could be heard for a mile. The madness of her reality split. Vengeance seeped into her veins. She will never be the same.
Fragments of each other all scattered over our flesh our mind. Nanoparticles mixed by the human touches and shared thoughts, that’s what we are fragments, and I love each fragments each frame and all especially the stills. Captivating.
The psychiatric said to him, You have bipolar disorder. He looked baffled, no mental illness ran in his family. In a daze he stared back at the doctor… Thinking I won’t live like this. What will everyone say, the stigma, it’s already too much I can barely function.
“Couldn’t have been that profound if it didn’t stick.”
I often dream of far away places and far away faces obscure and unfriendly, and I can’t seem to wake up.
Swear we were packed like a can of sardines in that car, but it didn’t matter we were happy just to be there
I watched as the sky blossemed into a live picture show above the horizon slowly revealing itself inch by inch rising as it painted the canvas of the sky, the illumination grew stronger it was a sunrise to remember.
They yelled “sinner! Murderess! You’re killing your unborn child. Specters claiming to be Christians judging her as she walked closer to the clinic doors. The door seemed a mile away, she couldn’t help but shrink away inside and pray….God help me.They judged her. But yet call themselves Christians. If that’s Christianity I want no part of it.They judged her. But yet call themselves Christians. If that’s Christianity I want no part of it. Then climbed upon the examination table.
I got in!!! I got in!!! As he ran into his clique of friends. Waving his acceptance letter to the university that would pave his way to his unknown future.
Her legs dangled from the edge of the bed. Feeling all hope gone. Wondering if heaven and hell exist will God let her in… She swallowed the pills three by three and uttered “Father, Son, Holy Spirit” looking down the bottle empty, as empty as she felt. The loss was too much. slowly consciousness slipped away.
I threw your little body up up into the air as you softly landed into my arms and I pulled you close. Your smell, your small hands your eyes big in wonderment looking at me… I was enveloped by your love my angel from God.
I narrowed in and lowered my knees just enough to give me the angle and sprint needed for an effortless beautiful dive.I swam to the edge of the pool looked up and it was you, we both smiled.
He was the object of her desire. He loved knowing this. Tormented her at times. Like Dangling carrots. Winds of change blew in and her heart finally desired someone who desired her back. He was left in the wake of her tides as she drifted away at sea farther from him and closer to the one to be her true lover. Regret festered in his desire at that moment.
At the speed of snail I passed your house. The wind blew harshly by. I stared hoping to catch a glimpse of you. I would have settled for the family dogs appearance. But you’re gone… And I wait like a fool believing you will return.
“Does our absolute rise beyond infinity or does it die when we do?”
“Sometimes I’m so tired of all of it I just feel like settling.”
Laying down eyes closed listening to the crackles of leaves beneath your feet and the trickle of the distant stream near by, my mind wanders, I can only imagine what we would do behind closed doors.
You’ll drive I’ll shoot. We’ll be a modern day Bonnie and Clyde. Naw Micky and Malory instead, what’s your thoughts?
The car door slightly open as one foot dangles in and the other out. Turning the key in the ignition I stop and grin thinking about you and I’m positive you’re grinning too thinking bout me, aren’t we just the two?Me and you.
She eagerly waited like a kid waiting to open a gift for his call. Listlessly she hung her body on the end of the bed, half on half hanging off. A despair that was crawling in her. Then it rang. Her heart jumped and she sprung for the phone, “Hey how you doing “His voice came across the line….. what he doesn’t know is she wasn’t doing nothing but hurting thinking he may not call. If he knew how she intense she felt he would call early on purpose….. But stubborn she’ll keep grim self deprecating sides to herself.
Mosaic of memories and pieces of a life kept in frames upon the shelf but not kept in order randomly arranged.
Can I be a part of your Life time? and all the ones in between……..
Finally She ran into him. After years there he was on the same grocery isle as me only feet away. Years she thought in the same town, same small town. There eyes met but she quickly looked away. It was too much as tears puddled in corners of her eyes she felt a hand on her shoulder, he finally found the courage to tell her, speak to her… Was it too late? The pain to much? Her heart said “not this time. Your moment of extraordinary has arrived.” Let him in.” So she looked at him then to the ground as tears flowed. He lifted her chin to look at him. That was all it took. Forever began.
Not for Reproduction~NJM~